At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
