perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
