this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
