Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
