I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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