I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
