My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
