Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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