My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
This is my gift to your gina
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
