everyone is single if you try hard enough
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
