Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize