yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
