physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
