He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
