Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
so explain again why im purple
no
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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