walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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