Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
