Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Come share oat with me in your robe
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize