do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
