Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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