I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
This is my gift to your gina
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
