End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
