I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
