I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
