PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
