Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Randomize
