I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
