drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
