not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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