ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
