I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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