All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
