I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
