yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
