Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
