people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
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