i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Randomize