if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
