You really coming over, don't trick.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
