He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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