Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
My penis needs a shock collar
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
