GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
