Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize