You're completely useless in the revolution.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize