i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize