Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize