This girl is more easily done than said...
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
