At least make sure they are 18
Why
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Randomize
