yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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