The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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