i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
